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• (512): View more from Texas

  he just found out his girl is having a boy. he's probably googling "Ed Hardy diapers" as we speak.

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• (502): View more from Kentucky

  I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore

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• (251): View more from Alabama

  how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?

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• (319): View more from Iowa

  the guy in the stall next to me, came in, farted, laughed, and proceeded to give himself some sort of hillbilly pep talk that included the phrase "big pussy".

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  Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (303): View more from Colorado

  I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day

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• (815): View more from Illinois

  So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.

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• (626): View more from California

  Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here.

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• (205): View more from Alabama

  I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will

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• (818): View more from California

  You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.

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  Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (636): View more from Missouri

  I just audibly asked myself if i wanted to masturbate.

  (636): View more from Missouri

  And then audibly agreed

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• (603): View more from New Hampshire

  If there is a ladylike way to throw up in your favorite toilet, I just did it.

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• (775): View more from Nevada

  This guy smelled his armpits before trying to approach me at the bar

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• (647): View more from Ontario

  I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.

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• (631): View more from New York

  Last night you referred to my vagina as a gym for your penis

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• (864): View more from South Carolina

  Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.

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