she said if she won the lottery she'd fuck me... isn't that like government funded prostitution?
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
I'm at work, and just realized I the beer smell I keep getting random whiffs of is my bra. I fail at life.
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
No fucking judgements. You know me. Chinese food vent sessions are safe places.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah to go race car driving with a 54 yr old gastroenterologist. I really wish you'd come to have that drink with me Wednesday
Oh my god I haven't had mozzarella sticks since I banged that Applebee's waiter
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
Sorry for throwing up in your humidifier last night, I thought it was some sort of electrical garbage can
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
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