why im i the only drunk person in the library?
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
I wish i could sleep and get drunk at the same time...those are my 2 biggest needs right now
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
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on the brightside, the semester can only get better from getting a dui at 8 am on the first day.
your optimism is becoming unhealthy
i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
Went from beach to class to bar all while wearing my swimsuit as pants. Clearly I'm dressed for success.
And the clouds opened up and the sex gods said I hate you alfalfa
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up this morning at 8 to my roommates still drunk, hanging out on the roof, and screaming at bikers. They couldn't figure out why they were into it.
My feelings are currently in a sea of vodka and "I don't give a shit"
Aren't they always?
We just got in a fight with grandma b/c she tried to tell us you didn't go hard.
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
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