Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
Since you're going to wake up and see one bajillion missed calls from me, I just want you to know that's a perfectly reasonable number. Now come downystairs.
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
I'm sure nobody at Walmart was wondering why I was wearing a glittery tutu and needed $300 changed into small bills
Remember the time you cried about coconuts
See and now you're talking. I am like the fairy godmother of hook ups.
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
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