We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
We need to start having sex underwater more often.
wanna go with us to feed the ducks bread soaked in vodka?
how could i say no?
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
We always say that. And then its 4am and someone is screaming at strippers.
I'm pretty sure you thought I could absorb alcohol through my dress
I woke up on your bathroom floor, i used your towel I found laying on the floor as a cape to get to your bed. I thought it would help me walk straight if I looked like a superhero
I'm sorry that I didn't get belligerently drunk and did not put my penis on your neck again
it's like getting dryhumped by a chainsaw in the very best possible way
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
Just so you know in the morning, yes you did send your bartender a snap of your boobs. No I didn't try to stop you because you used sound logic for doing so.
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
Randomize
