Oh fyi, I gave your card to a homeless guy last night and told him you were the world's hottest blonde girl who only likes black men...Sorry
I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
and then they started calling me 'Shitshow Shandra', which apparently i took as a compliment.
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
Well see how he likes it when I randomly start crying and saying my dads name during sex I WILL RUIN ALL HIS FUTURE BONERS
When one is stoned and browsing online dating profiles all men sound like serial killers.
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
We were kinda loud so his roommate woke up and to make up for it he invited him to a threesome. I can't drink whiskey anymore.
i need to put some appletini on your dick
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
Mom got drunk as hell, crashed Dad's wedding and some how left with the best man. This is why you should be glad you aren't my sibling.
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
Randomize
