why did i save someone in my phone as corn dildo?
I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
Turns out he's not gay. He just didn't know how else to say he's not into me. He just hit on my sister.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
He walked door to door asking if anyone needed to get laid. Surprisingly, that ended his drought
I'm sorry. I just realized our 'big night out' ended up being you driving my high ass to get burritos and back.
We get an extra hour of sleep. That means we can take an extra shot tonight. Sound logic. Thank you daylight savings.
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
But if I live with you I'll help pay rent. Only if you promise no 50 shades of what the fuck internet hookups
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
the person she was housesitting for had a christmas card from charlie sheen on the fridge so we fucked on the couch and just slept in the bed
Randomize
