Why don't I have your new number? And who have I been texting?
omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
we just got kicked out of the mexican restaurant. i have a full pitcher of margarita's hiding under my coat.
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
He's almost as awesome as vicodin.
Can i tell him you said that? Cuz i know that means a lot coming from you
I told your dad we had a nice lunch and hung out for awhile. It seemed more appropriate than "I had a bite of his canned chili and then we ripped each others clothes off."
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
There's a quesaritto in the oven. Neither of us have been to Taco Bell in 3 weeks.
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
If there's a nuclear war you can come over. I'll feed you soup and you can rig up car batteries to power the coffee pot and toaster. We can grow tomatoes and chickens.
Randomize
