I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
I now own a bag of cigarettes and have no purse, awesome
I should have bailed a long time ago. I mean, he has a bible verse-a-day app next to his dick pics in his phone.
I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
i woke up with blood and cuts on my face and i don't remember anything after winning four games of beer pong in a row last night. and i'm still drunk.
you are a true champion. bear my children.
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
The fact that you cheered yourself on while you puked saying it was your first college puke, blacked out, and sang taylor swift to the toilet confirms the fact that we are related. I've never been more proud.
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