i just had 3 doubles lined up on top of a urinal, texting with one hand and my dick in the other. I an fucking awesome.
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
I tried to twerk on a barn in 3 inch heels at a party last night and nose dived into mud. These were all new friends. I'm probably not allowed back. Cool.
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
When you wake up, I have a unicorn coloring book, crayons, mini cupcakes, and booze.
Your ability to whip out your dick and take a pic anytime I text you is startling.
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
I don’t want to brag, but vows, morals and will power are no match for my blow job skills
Randomize
