I swear she didn't look like that last week.
from now on my penis is your penis
barbara walters just said penis...
I need a secretary to manage my drinking schedule.
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
I had to explain the gravity bong to my mom. Right after she pointed out I have a lot of dicks on my floor at any given moment.
This snow needs to melt so I can get wasted on someones front lawn
i swear to god it was like we were fucking in 9 dimensions
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
Don’t listen to me, I’m walking around wearing nothing but rave bracelets and headphones shouting “yeeeeaaahhhhhh”
Randomize
