what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
Mike passed out early so we kept filling his mouth with redi-whip and letting the dog lick it out, but he started getting hives so we stopped.
Can I come by? I want you to meet my squirrel
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
Speaking of which.. there's underwear in my backseat and Arby's cheese sauce on my door handle. So much for my new Volvo bringing out my classy side.
I'm basically cruising around listening to 90's gangsta rap with my meatball sub telling people to go fuck themselves
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
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