I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
She pulled a cheeseburger out of her purse. I have missed her so much.
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
Just used my cancer results to get a free lap dance. Great day just got better.
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
you know, this Evan Williams whiskey isn't so bad when it's watered down a bit and you're home by yourself on a Saturday listening to Snoop Dog alone in your apartment without pants or any plans for your future...
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
Randomize
