Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
My apartment smells like a lavender field inside of a giant bong.
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
5% want to drink juice and feel better, 95% just want to touch your butt
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
It's my birthday, dammit, and I'm getting something for free. I don't care if it's just a drink at the bar.
YOU CAN GET THIS DICK FOR FREE
How do you get the "hangs out with drunk assholes" insurance
Got electrocuted a second ago, is it weird that I have a boner?
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
Randomize
