i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
So after I was tied with a feather boa he left me there with KFC and cherry coke
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
Trying to Jedi mind trick myself into not throwing up. This is not the esophagus you are looking for.
Someone put pennies in the toilet. This isn't a fucking wishing well
you should probably call the Bronx Zoo in the morning to formally apologize
its the right thing to do
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
No. I'm home alone and 100% dickless. I hate my life.
Randomize
