i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
Could a canary swim?
Last time I ever let you pet sit.
I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
can you put a coffee maker in the dish washer? yo know what, nvm i want to be surprised
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
Damn why is there no horse blowjob emoji?
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
Now that it's fall I have to prepare for the imminent arrival of ripped up sweatpants shoved into folded over sequined uggs
I told you I missed you and you said you missed me as much as you miss a urinary tract infection. I get it. You're still mad.
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.