Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
Took her home last night and it was like trying to put an oyster in a slot machine. I may have drank a little too much.
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
19 Confessions From A Dude With A Micropenis
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
Dipping doritos in ranch. Why doesn't he love me?
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
You were pouring Patron into the window of the squad car trying to get the police dog to drink it
So thats why that cop beat my ass?
17 Exes Admit Why They Were Crazy In Their Past Relationship
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
My life is literally "I'm too horny you can't leave" or "let's have pie" there's like no inbetween
Turns out he's actually a she. Might keep dating her just to see Mom's reaction.
i got pulled over completely sober but looking like death. dick cop made me do a field sobriety test. he also said "no sober person could have 7 BK bags"