my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
I just had a cup of orange juice and thought it didnt taste right. It didnt have vodka in it.
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
Do you ever feel like your dog agrees with you? Like REALLY really agrees.
IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS
U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
So it's official the pockets of my work apron exist solely for the purpose of secretly flipping off asshole customers and not losing my job.
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
He ran out to tell us that somebody flooded the bathroom, then went back in there fell on his ass and asked why the floor was wet
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
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