I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
This is your monthly public service announcement that sexual services will temporarily cease from Wednesday night to Monday. Please plan accordingly and have a nice day =D
Just induced vomiting to put out a carpet fire.
Everyone is cheering
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
I had a dream last night you were Aladdin. I think due to me watching 6 hours of Disney movies and the fact you told me you were wearing a vest.
Dreams are coming true for both of us.
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
I found you in the bathroom. You were sitting cross-legged on the floor wearing nothing but socks completely surrounded by broken crayons.
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
i don't remember much about your party last weekend but i remember you being so drunk you were crying in your driveway about pickles at four am
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
Randomize
