Definitely locked eyes with the stripper who gave me a lapdance last night as she walked by me and into the Ann Taylor Loft in Times Square.
I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
my bedside table was not meant to hold this many beer bottles.
He poured all of the vodka into the sweet tea and said that tomorrow it would be called 'surprise drunk.' then we had sex.
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
Even though we had just had to physically take her off of someones lawn she was peeing on when they came outside, she still insisted on walking unassisted the rest of the way home. It was dignity meets shit show.
I'LL COME GET YOU. GOTTA FIND A SUIT THAT COVERS TIT BRUISES FIRST.
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
Randomize
