Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
Dude, no matter how drunk you are, it's not okay to hug every other guy at a strip club. Mainly because boners are far too common.
I just got turned down by a drunk fat chick. At my own birthday party. God hates me.
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
she crawled under her car and passed out. Unfortunately her feet were sticking out and someone called 911 because they thought she had been run over.
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
I promised myself in the hospital that I would give up drinking for however long the cast stayed on. Thank god it was only soft tissue and not a fracture.
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
Randomize
