I'm drinking while my friends build sand castles, now I know how my dad used to feel
I KNOW you don't honestly think you can pay me back in lotto tickets.
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
I think forcing your little sister to drink with you on a Wednesday when she has school the next day is the low point of alcoholism.
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
Also, last night I had a dream that I was in a victoria's secret fashion show and they made me wear a t-shirt over my lingerie. Spring dieting begins now.
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
I need to stop getting so excited when a guy unzips his pants and its bigger than my boyfriends. I look like a kid in a candy store.
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
I put tequila in my salad dressing yesterday. Step the fuck up.
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
Nothing says depression like laying in your bed stoned, naked, and eating a cupcake
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
Drunk me is having trouble keeping up with sober me's standards
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