Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
I just wanna be some guy's midlife crisis
he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
He looked at my vag and said "you have a nice situation down there. Good work"
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
Would it be inappropriate to do a science fair project on whether the type of drunk a person is is determined by nature or nurture
dude you're not even a fucking science major
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
I also farted in bed this morning and said, "I don't even care. My body deserves that."
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
Randomize
