Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
a hangover this bad deserves a feeding tube
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
vaguely remember the bartender stopping me outside last night so he could pull the duct tape out of my hair
he tried to breastfeed my turtle
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
He was jealous of me and threatened by me. I'm like, just cause I could fuck your girlfriend doesn't mean I'm going to
She's not even my type. She doesn't have a penis or a drug problem
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
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