we are at a mexican restaurant and the tv is playing mexican porn. dad won't stop watching.
Lets go to the mall and pick up some fat chicks and take them out tonight so we can be the skinny friends
Note to Self: No matter how horny, turned on or in the moment you are, never go down on your gf after she had soccer practice.
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
Sorry you called when I was puking in a cheetos bag
In other news, someone I've had sex with won jeopardy last night.
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Celebrating landing my dream job by watching zombie movies and drinking free booze in the bath. I'm like 90% sure I just won life.
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
Shoot me. Oh my god shoot me. My moms ex "likes assholes"
Whatcha doing tonight? Reply TURNUP if you are drinking, or STOP to cancel messages
I feel like I was playing penis roulette last night nd I landed on the wrong one.
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
Randomize