I was just at the urinal, started to go, then farted, then said oh yea out loud, then heard someone move in the stall behind me
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
WTF WHY ARE YOU STILL NOT DOING A BEER BONG?! THE TOILET CLOG CAN WAIT
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
Someone took a picture of their balls on my phone last night. BEAUTIFUL PACKAGE. I will find this man.
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
There are no winners in a lube eating competition.
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
Randomize
