I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
Just watered mom's plants with leftover mixed drinks full of Bacardi Silver. I'm such a good daughter.
Hey, it was your idea to keep her occupied with the barscanner on your phone.
you didnt need to give her a fucking sharpie. there are handmade barcodes everywhere. including my cock. fucker.
Xanax and an ambien. And wine. I'm just waiting for mouth to mouth from some hot EMT. Sort of like the slutty girls version of sleeping beauty
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
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