she looked like the bat from fern gully.
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
Could you please tell them to stop whispering "thundercunt" every time I walk in the room?
Attempting to teach the cat how to shake. I need a job.
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
Nothing is more awkward than taking a dump while someone is crying in the bathroom.
Crap I still need to get you a wedding gift. I'm just gonna give you a bag full of cash, lube, and condoms. And I'll use furry handcuffs instead of ribbon to tie the gift bag handles together.
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
HAPPY AIDS-LESS FOURTH OF JULY YOU HEALTHY FUCK
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
He must be a special kind of stupid to cheat on a women who works at a funeral home. Does he not understand you can get rid of dead bodies easier than most Americans?
Randomize
