Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
He brought me bullshit flowers and a bullshit apology. Even shrek did more than that for Fiona. And he's an ogre. Does this not say anything about him?
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
Multi-day drunkenness is to binge drinking as black diamonds are to skiing. They're tough and confusing and you hurt afterwards, but you did it and you probably got an alright story along the way.
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
Randomize