Just FYI I rubbed poison oak on all your sheets and blankets so we all will know who you hooked up with (in about a day)
i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
Yes, you did come over last night. You also tried to give my dog a blowjob. You got rejected.
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
Just copped mushrooms from a dude in a business suit. U comin or what?
How is it possible that I'm still a virgin and you've managed to have sex in a cheetah print onesie TWICE
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
So apparently I twerked on my coworkers last night. One month at the new job n I guess this is how I'm getting to know people
Worst case scenario- he paid me for sex with meatloaf. There are worse thing, right? I mean at least is was good meatloaf.
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Randomize
