Dear everyone that texted me last night wondering where i was. i ended up face down blacked up drunk before i made it to the party. My bad
I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
Either she got face surgery at midnight, or i need to stop drinking...
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Even if he doesn't call, at least I can say i fucked a mascot.
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
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Bren left me with a lovely parting gift. Newfouund alcoholism. I'm on the kitchen floor, hugging a bottle of vodka. It's my only friend now.
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
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