She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
He came on my face and told me I looked like a gingerbread house.
the only bad part about drinking alone is that in the morning there's nobody who can tell you what you did
can you pick up eggs and chocolate sauce on your way home?
what kind of party is this?
the best kind ever
While drunk it seemed like a good idea to barricade my roommate in his room with everything that we could move in our apartment, waking up to him screaming from it collapsing on top of him was just an added bonus.
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
I'm pretty sure the rest of my evening will consist of masturbating, drinking tequila and watching children's movies.
I was so drunk I got stuck in the middle of a revolving door
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
Randomize
