lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
Mym mom just came downstairs as I got ghome ans I'm trying to act SO CASUAL as i stabdh here hut icant help bur be like 'girl where's ther Turkey sandwiche s' haahaa
I literally need you to talke care of me soooo9o9oooooo drubj gril makin a sabdwiche. SO far its judst bred and paper towel...
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
I might have been fine if i had magic teleportation powers and could have skipped the car ride between bar and home
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
And then I remembered we banged to Beethoven & I was like you will never get this ass again
I want falafel more than sex right now. That's really saying something for me...
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
Randomize
