So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
I need a good reason NOT to eat this entire jar of nutella right now
The interviewer had a hook for his right hand I TRIED TO SHAKE HIS HOOK WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple.
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
You gotta own your makeout pics Matt. They're like badges of honor
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
Randomize
