You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
the date was going great.. until he pulled down his pants and asked if there was any hair in between his cheeks.
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
I drink more single than I do in relationships. Except with assface.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
The bartender just legitimately thanked me for breaking the cycle of speed metal by playing mmmbop.
i don't think that has ever happened before in the history of man
I just feel like everything is too perfect
He's probably a serial killer or chronic masturbator
Or both. Which is common
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
So there is a 50% chance that he just left my house and a 100% chance that I have to be up for work in 2 hours...
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
Randomize
