Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
i took my goldfish out of his bowl last night and put him in my bed
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
The last thing I remember is trying to split my bridesmaid dress down the back like the incredible hulk.
and you succeeded.
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
I just got carded by a ten year old.
Gonna open a taco bell in colorado. Millions bro.
I was smelling my bathroom to make sure it didn't reek of weed...I spaced out and realized I was face to the wall sniffing it for 5 minutes.
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
Turns out my mom didn't really want to know I was in a new dimension last night from smoking so much.
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
Randomize
