tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
Watching Fresh Prince at 9am with a beer in hand and he just said to Uncle Phil "Sometimes I worry that I'll never get my life together." I feel like that was a sign from above or something
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
One three hour marathon fuck session and now she's divorcing her husband. Should I get business cards made?
So about that you can bill me for the chair but it was David's idea to jump from the window sill into the washer with "clothing pillows of cloudiness" to land on to get ahold of him you have to phone his mother
I just talked to her she really hates you like a lot
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
Randomize