i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
You poured sparks in your panties and NOW you're wondering why you have a UTI?
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
I dont think a "sorry ive slept with most of your teammates" text will do much
you can't wake me up at 4am to suck your dick and then give me a high five at the bar
I want what they have, but in the meantime I have a whole bottle of rum to which I'm quite devoted
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
he had shaved armpits. I repeat: HE SHAVED. HIS. ARMPITS! First hookup of 2014 and it's with a weirdo. Alcohol:1 Me:0
I made a half way decent playlist
Im gonna call it "hanging myself"
I just sent him a message bearing my soul about how much he means to me as a friend and his first response is "are you drunk?"
Shit like this is why I'm a bitch to everyone.
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
Randomize
