some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
i came out of the bathroom and he had christmas lights wrapped up his leg, around his boner, and down the other side
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
So many bounce houses so little time
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
I woke up in bed alone w 2 bite marks on my boob... Salt and pepper shakers In my purse along w a bottle of steak sauce.... The drunkasauraus has struck again
I'll just tell your children you were the queen of drunk town and you had a giant purple monkey named bongo
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
MIDGETS
????
he couldn't get a boner so he asked me to sing you shook me all night long to his penis. I think it was weirder that it actually worked
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
I love when my neighbors have passionate, loud sex to remind me that I'm not getting laid
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
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