This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
She always acts like she's doing me a favor with a hand job. I've been giving myself hand jobs for almost 20 years.
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
I wish on days I started my period Chipotle would come to my house with a burrito bar ... Then give me a chocolate cake and a large beer.
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
I woke up with broken tostitos all over my bed and a snap chat of myself flipping off the camera.
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
I should have known it wouldn’t work. Someone saved in her phone as “Subway Sex” called the week before the wedding
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