His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
we ran out of wine so you tried to make some by throwing grapes and nail polish remover in a blender.
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
I am drunk. Riding an elevator. You can smell the beer. Doctor on with me just smiling at me... He agrees, fuck cancer.
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
Uber driver has left leg up on the dash and turn signal on for about a mile, there's Chipotle wrappers on the floor, but she's hot. 5 stars.
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
QUIT BEING A BITCH, DRINK SOME PEPTO, AND PUKE ON OUR FOES
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
Randomize
