she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
I just had the fat girl at the party come tell me I look sad and offer me a beer. I'm out.
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
We've reached that awkward stage of the relationship where he's in love with me when he's drunk, but sober him is still afraid of commitment.
she just totaled her parents new car because there was a bee in the car. So she crashed into a light pole to kill it.
Hangovers were designed by God when he decided that so far he had taken it WAY TOO EASY on me.
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
Just think about how many life skills I lack. Cooking... Driving... Sobriety...
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
They told him he could only pay in monopoly money and he pulls out a wad of it from his pocket... i think im in love
Randomize
