i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
I was going to call you an awful person for that. but then i realized we're both awful people.
Really* awful people.
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
Sorry about that whole "setting your deck on fire" thing.
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
Bring fortys. we have the duct tape. its onnn mothafuckaaaa
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
That reminds me of the morning I woke up on the sidewalk covered in chicken wings
Is she talking about a testicle cuff or just a cock ring? How did you meet this girl?
Is there a big difference?
It’s about the same as the difference between a night of drunken sex with a stripper at the Bellagio and being robbed and left for dead by a crystal meth tweaker
Randomize
