my being single is dangerous.
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
he stopped making out with me and said "can I make you grilled cheese? I feel like I owe YOU something"
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
Oh I woke up in my neighbors garage using one of their sleeping bags, as my neighbor was doing laundry in there.
I peed in a 7/11 last night. Like literally pretended I pretended I was shopping, looked around, and peed on boxes in the corner. No more tequila
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
Thursday could be nutella day. You could make me a nutella sandwich and then fuck me senseless
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
For the record you're an amazing lay and you have great taste in breakfast sandwiches
Seriously, I really just burned my nipple making ravioli.. I'd explain, but no reasoning makes this acceptable:/
Randomize
