well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
i'm getting the "you hooked up with my friends" speech from him. i'm returning with the "gotta keep my quota up" speech
Turned out the thing on the lampshade was a bloodstain, not a bedbug. We feel much safer now.
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
I just watched a stripper purchase $43 of Rockstar and corn nuts. Godamnit! We need helmet cams.
it's the amount of time you spend on preventing me from puking that really cements this friendship
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
The bride is so wasted, she fell into her cake.I wanna be on her level
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
Randomize
