I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
it sounded like he was fisting a can of crisco.
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
The highlight of your blackout was when you drunk showered with the garden hose and emailed your boss your vacation requests for the next year.
My ex was there, the 2 girls I'm seeing showed up and I had a pocket full of VIP passes 2 the strip club. Had all the makings of an epic night but I fell asleep at the bar.
He brought her home and fucked her in a gingerbread man costume in a cardboard rapunzel castle. He had a pretty good night.
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
Sometimes I wish I could tell all my past/present hookups what the nicknames that my friends and I have assigned them.
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
Randomize
