Not only do I have sand in my ass, but a crab pinched me while we were fucking. Still totally worth it.
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
sorry i couldnt make it to your birthday last night. i admit i chose being a whore over you.
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties.
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
i woke up in a bed of pop tarts
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
Randomize
