from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
Well it's official... The first guy I ever gave head to now holds 2 world records. Should I text him asking if I can try and break my record?
My roommate is watching gummy bears "race" from a mega-marshmallow to his lava lamp.
I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
The cat be actin like a 2:30 am poop is the time to tell me all about her thoughts and fears in life. No bitch, this is definitely alone time.
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
i think i just lost a toe
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
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