I think scott just propositioned me for sex
i told him to take shots to cure a hangover and he told me i was "walking the steppingstones to alcoholism"
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
We didn't have a blender so we made the margaritas by running over a garbagebag full of ice with the car and then stirring it with a knife in a French-press coffee pot. CAN YOU SAY RESOURCEFUL?
I knew we would be good together when you made me lick jameson off your boob while you screamed along with racks on racks
I don't care how sexy you think I look in my scrubs. Wanting a blow job is not a medical emergency.
I just did a line of coke with an Olympic bronze medallist. I guess we know why he only got bronze.
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
What am I doing with my life
Sleeping with dudes who have peacocks apparently.
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
The magician guy on probation is here at the bar. I'm gonna get him to show me a trick
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
Randomize