oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
When you went through airport security you asked if the could check if a baby was in there. That drunk.
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
My Saturday dick is so much more impressive than my Tuesday dick.
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
Just so you know, classy bitches change the morning after in a CVS bathroom.
My heart is swelling with pride right now. I fucking love you.
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
There is a Victoria's Secret pageant on right now with Taylor Swift singing in lingerie. I didn't know a penis could get this erect.
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
I'm worried my dog collar isn't going to come in time. I might be trying on dog collars at PetSmart next week. That could get awkward.
I was walking out of the bar when he said I'll see you later and I said I'll see you in my dreams and then fell face first and broke my nose
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
Randomize
