Are we in a gay sports bar?
I'll go out only because I know the starving children in third-world countries would frown upon us if we let an hour of free sangria go to waste...
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
It's official. Every single female in their late teens and early 20s get their fb statuses from a pool of cliched "quotes" which all say, without saying, "boys treat me like shit, I know they do, but one day I'll find 'the guy' who will treat me right no matter how psychotic I am." Vom.
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
Apparently I pulled that girl's number while I was trying to insist my drivers license had enough money on it to cover the tab.
You drunkenly said something along the lines of "move forever" to the lady standing in your way. Needless to say you had too many mimosas at breakfast.
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
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